True Confessions

Lest anyone think that because my screen name is "FitMama" and my IG is @happyfitnessmama, I must live an incredibly fit, "put together", always on top of it healthy life... I thought I might share some true confessions from my week.

True Confession #1- I am writing this blog from the bathroom where I sit on the floor patiently waiting for my Little Man to go potty. He's just barely 2, and has decided that he would like to try potty training. We bought him a "Thomas" toilet seat, which has become one of life's biggest thrills. He's had 2 dry diapers today, very exciting, yes, but it still takes him quite a while to connect the need to "go" with the necessary internal mechanics of making it happen. Plus, he knows that his reward for going potty on the toilet is getting to wear his Thomas pull-ups. Which means he will sit on the seat for 30 minutes if necessary to earn that pull-up...

True Confession #2- In related news, I made the newbie mom decision to take my son out in a pull-up today for errands before he had done his daily poo-poo... So when we were at my husband's church office making copies, I had the pleasure of pulling a poopie diaper down his legs while trying to maneuver it safely over his feet and into a plastic bag. His legs remained relatively clean. My finger, unfortunately, was not similarly spared.

True Confession #3 - Before writing this blog, I devoured 2 bags of my son's cookies. They're the organic, whole grain version of a Teddy Graham. They have amaranth in them. I'm not exactly sure what that is, but it makes me feel like they're not so bad for Little Man. Or me. I ate the chocolate kind. Yup, 2 bags. And now I really want some Fig Newtons.

True Confession #4- I have a terrible weakness for Trader Joe's red licorice, the thick chunky kind that tastes like artificial strawberries and gets stuck in my teeth.

True Confession #5- I forgot that my son was turning 2 until the day before his birthday. Trying to plan a birthday party was, needless to say, quite delayed. So he's had 2 parties with different family members, and one set of grandparents still wasn't able to make it. Mommy fail. One day I will be that mom that makes plans months in advance and actually does the things she's written down in her planner.

True Confession #6 - I occasionally take parenting advice from Daniel Tiger's Neighborhood.

True Confession #7- I haven't done a real workout in... Well, that's all you need to know. I walk, I play, but that "kick butt, I did a workout and now I'm sweating" feeling... It's been too long. Tomorrow morning. Gotta happen.

True Confession #8 - We have tacos EVERY Monday. We have had tacos EVERY MONDAY since we got married 5 1/2 years ago. My husband is a man of routine. I'm so sick of tacos.

True Confession #9- I forgot to clip Little Man's toenails until they were literally curling over the top of his toe when he was about 18 months. I just didn't notice until they were unnatural and creepy...

True Confession #10 - Every week I plan to blog 3 times, workout every morning, have my shake and tea every day, and journal. The only part I manage is the shake and tea. Herbalife saves me from getting fat from lack of workouts, too many children's cookies and red licorice...

Well, that's enough for now. And Little Man is still on the toilet, waiting for that magical tinkle which earns him a Thomas pull-up. I'm going to have to intervene. It's time to make tacos...

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"Chutes and Ladders"... A New Perspective

On the box, it says "3+", so I already knew that attempting to play "Chutes and Ladders" with my just barely 2 year old would be...creative. The game was a special birthday present and Little Man has been loving it, and it's a different game each time. Today, while rejoicing for the rain that is so needed during our West Coast drought, I was preparing myself for the entire day without outdoor playtime. I was geared up with my Herbalife Tea (it's like having a personal assistant for my brain) and making plans.

Books and games were definitely on the agenda, although Little Man was nonplussed when I said that the rain meant we couldn't go "ah-side". He simply said, "HAT", and ran to his bedroom. He had been wearing only jammie pants, but when he returned he was half way into his jacket. After I helped him get the rest on, he pulled the hood up (with one ear covered and the other comically sticking out) and ran to the door. "Mommy. Dacket on. Hat on. AH-SIDE." And we hadn't even eaten breakfast yet.

Anyway, we spent the better part of the morning on chores and reading his favorite books. To keep us occupied after naptime, I turned to the exciting board game which has heretofore offered about 3 minutes of distraction before he's off to something else. Today I was hoping we could extend it a bit, so I tried to draw his attention to the board and not just the exciting spinny thingy.

 "Look, buddy, the kids can go down the slides!" Big mistake. He spent the next two minutes begging me for slides, and I had to once again explain that we couldn't go outside, and yes, the park is outside... When we were able to move on, he was able to enjoy sliding the game piece children down the slides all over the board. Well, then I suggested that some of the kids could go up the ladder.
ABSOLUTELY NOT. Out of nowhere, he yells, "NOOOOOOO", and grabs the game piece and throws him off the board. Why, you ask? I have no idea. There is no profit in trying to make sense of why the ladders were so offensive. But apparently that completely violated the rules of the game we were playing. Still, we don't allow yelling the toddler "n" word like that, so he got the stern look from Mommy with the warning,
 "Little Man, you may not yell no at Mommy. If you throw the pieces or yell at Mommy again, you will go in timeout."
"I sowwy Mommy. No saint-yoo foh timeout." (Sound it out, it's toddler speak...) That little warning went a long way, even enough for me to ask,
"What do you think the kids do on the ladders?" Then we spent a couple of minutes with me racing game pieces up all of the ladders while LM tried to pounce on them. Who knew that Chutes and Ladders was really a maze with the goal being to evade capture by the little human towering above? When all of the kids had escaped from the top of the final ladder, they got a short reprieve on the carpet before LM grabbed them all.
 "Mommy, hoosa bobda lodi humna soo?" (Really, no kidding, that's what it sounds like!)
"Hmmm, I don't know, buddy..."
"Ochay, Mommy. Humda swanda lo. Dis. Mommy, whaszat?!!!" (Pointing to the little girl game piece)
"That's a little girl."
"Mommy, whaszat?!!!!" (Pointing to another little girl game piece)
"That's another little girl."
"Ochay Mommy. Uh, oh. Wheh ah yoo tids?!" (Putting all of the game pieces under the hutch in the living room)
"Oh, no, are they lost, buddy? Where did all of the kids go?"
"Ah so dis dere. Zatch's house."
"Oh, the kids all went to Zac's house?"
"Yeah!"
And that was that. Game over, the kids all went to Zac's house. LM then moved on to telling me all about Zac's family (they are real, not people he made up, just fyi).

Who knew that the SECRET real goal of Chutes and Ladders was only to pretend to escape the toddler via ladders, but in the end to be captured so that you could take a special trip to Zac's house?!

Well, now you know.

What's the best way your child has created a special new way to play?

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How Winnie the Pooh Saved Meal Prep...

I have a toddler, so sometimes I act like an airhead. That's life.

As part of my plan to overcome that, I decided to have meals prepared for a week of healthy lunches. Healthy food in the fridge would hopefully help me stop forgetting to eat vegetables. I bought all of the veggies, cooked the quinoa and lentils, and figured I would prep all of those veggies in a food processor for a simple "mix and eat" meal.

Sounds simple. And it was. Until I lost a piece of the food processor. I had finished the carrots, so the processor bowl was nearly full. There was just enough room for some sugar snap peas to be added. I figured I could fill the "chute" with a few peas and be done in seconds. Then the phone rang. 

I need to make a note to quit answering the phone while doing... anything. It always throws me off.

Off the phone, I turned to the food processor.

But where was the plunger thing? As you can see from where my hand is pointing, the snap peas were in place. And there should be a little plunger thing that pushes the peas down to get grated. I had it when I grated the carrots 2 minutes before. I needed it to finish the last part of my meal prep. One final step. 

But no. I absolutely could not find it, anywhere. 

Enter my husband. I called him at work for moral support. It sounded something like,

"Babe, I've done it again. I've lost something that I JUST had. I'm going crazy.

 I'm just so tired of being this spacey!"

As I explained, he patiently listened and assured me that 

he doesn't think I'm actually crazy. 

Then genius struck. Hours of watching Winnie the Pooh with our kiddo

 gave my husband an idea.

"Remember when Pooh and the others get lost, and Pooh tries to think backward? 

Try NOT looking for the plunger thing.

 Look for something else and maybe it will lead you there!"

You see, Rabbit had led Pooh and Piglet in a circle while trying to find home. They repeatedly ended up back at the same hole. Pooh's suggestion? Look for the hole and maybe they would arrive at home!

Well, at that point, even Winnie the Pooh seemed smarter than me. So I decided I would look for the carrots instead of the plunger. I knew exactly where the carrots were, so I removed the lid to the food processor and stared at them for a moment, feeling like this was really a new low... Taking tips from Winnie the Pooh, for pete's sake...

And then suddenly, there it was. I saw it! The plunger had been in it's place the whole time! I thought I had been putting the peas down the chute, but I was really filling up the hollow plunger. Problem solved, thank you Winnie the Pooh.

Except that now I feel like more of an airhead than ever...

Join us.

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 share photos of your comical moments, and tag them #movementofmoms
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